"I'm just one hundred and one, five months and a day."
"I can't believe that!" said Alice.
"Can't you?" the Queen said in a pitying tone. "Try again: draw a long breath, and shut your eyes."
Alice laughed. "There's no use trying," she said: "one can't believe impossible things."
"I daresay you haven't had much practice," said the Queen. "When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."
-Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
I'm not a morning person, so, after careful consideration, here are my five post-breakfast impossible thoughts:
1. An elephant bed made out of cobwebs. I was thinking of hammocks and hammocks are usually crocheted (wait, are they?) and crochet looks like cobwebs and that made me think of elephants which are the antithesis of crochet because they're heavy and cumbersome unlike the ladylike elegance of crochet (which is a really fun word the more I say it). Sorry spiders, your fibers are futile for bedding.
2. Decent music on the radio. Ever since they stopped playing NSYNC, radio hasn't been the same, but mostly, radio hasn't caught on to electroswing yet:
3. A calm household. My family has no chill, none. This will never happen unless secret sidekick ninjas of Bruce Lee's yore tie us up and put on a classic Bollywood movie.
P.S: Please let it be "Hum Hain Rahi Pyar Ke".
4. Staying within my budget. Wait, what budget? I usually like to make sure my bank account is at an even number. That means something right? #millennialprobz
5. I'm going to buy chicken pumpkin applesauce when Ghostface Killah drops an album. Research and statistics will agree that that phrase, in that order, has never before been said thus having made it not only unique, but also impossible because I'm not sure if Ghostface even drops albums.
Related but unrelated note: Read The Tao of Wu